Aliens crash-land in the American southwest, and it’s a race between NASA and the CIA over whether the truth is ever exposed. Also, it’s a race between my attention and my eyelids–this is an incredibly soporific film.

Starring Darren McGavin, Robert Vaughn, Gary Collins, James Hampton and Pamela Bellwood. Written by Thomas C. Chapman and James L. Conway. Directed by James L. Conway.

 

Mary Versus the Movies Newsletter #88: May Roundup 

Episode 185 – Newsies (1992)

Episode 186 – Earth Girls Are Easy (1989)

Episode 187 – Threads (1984)

Episode 188 – Hangar 18 (1980)

Welcome to the Mary Versus the Movies newsletter! It’s been a long month

EPISODE 185 – NEWSIES (1992)

Newsboys of the streets unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains.

We welcome back my sister Anne Jones to talk about one of her favorite movies, Newsies, the story of the 1899 New York City newsboys strike, which I didn’t know was a Disney musical. Life is full of surprises.

Truthfully–I know there is a Broadway show adapted from the film, but I had no idea the film itself would be a musical. And it’s a good one, with the usual Alan Menkin flourishes.

Starring Christian Bale, Bill Pullman, Robert Duval, and Ann Margaret.  Written by Bob Tzudiker and Noni White. Directed by Kenny Ortega. Music by Alan Menkin, lyrics by J. A. C. Redford.

Support the Philadelphia Avengers: https://www.instagram.com/phillyavengers/

EPISODE 186 – EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY (1989)

A manicurist from The Valley dumps her cheating doctor fiance for a trio of hairy aliens in this campy sci-fi musical comedy that’s better than its reputation. Underappreciated at its release, this bubblegum comedy is a great time capsule of 1980s pop design–part Memphis Milano, part Miami Vice/Tropical Deco aesthetic style, part Lisa Frank Trapperkeeper, and all San Fernando Valley. 

Starring Geena Davis, Julie Brown, Jeff Goldblum, Damon Wayans, Jim Carrey, and Charles Rocket. Written by Julie Brown, Charley Coffey, and Terrence E. McNally. Directed by Julien Temple.

EPISODE 187 – THREADS (1984)

It’s the end of the world as we know it, and the living envy the dead. The threads of civilization are destroyed in a nuclear war, and Britain is thrust into a new dark age. And we don’t even get to have any of the fun stuff like barbarians on motorcycles.

A docudrama similar to the American tv movie The Day After, this BBC production about the leadup and aftermath of a nuclear war is considered one of the bleakest films ever made. (It’s not, that would be On the Beach, but this is pretty close.)

We talk about Chuck Berry, Carl Sagan, King Arthur, Mad Max, Riddley Walker, and yes, the bleakest movie of all time, On the Beach. It’s a party.

Also, for those who are curious, this is the PSA they’re playing in the background throughout the film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yrv505R-0U

The most underrated part of Threads is how this is playing in the background, visually referenced in several scenes, all to say “this was bullshit, you’re not going to survive if there’s a nuclear war, or if you do, you won’t think it’s worth it”.

Starring Karen Meagher, Reece Dinsdale, Steve Halliwell, and Jane Hazelgrove. Written by Barry Hines. Directed by Mick Jackson.

EPISODE 188 – HANGAR 18 (1980)

Aliens crash-land in the American southwest, and it’s a race between NASA and the CIA over whether the truth is ever exposed. Also, it’s a race between my attention and my eyelids–this is an incredibly soporific film.

Rarely has a film looked more like television; any random episode of TJ Hooker is more cinematic than this.

Starring Darren McGavin, Robert Vaughn, Gary Collins, James Hampton and Pamela Bellwood. Written by Thomas C. Chapman and James L. Conway. Directed by James L. Conway

HOLLYWOOD AVALON – THE BLACK KNIGHT (1954)

A young blacksmith joins King Arthur’s court and hopes to win the hand of the fair Linet, but first he must defeat Vikings, Druids, the villainous Sir Palamedies, King Mark, and a very burly guy in a turban. If it didn’t feature brownface and a far-too-old Alan Ladd in the title role, it might have been a pretty good movie.

Starring Alan Ladd, Patricia Medina, Peter Cushing, Patrick Troughton, Anthony Bushell, and Harry Andrews. Directed by Tay Garnett. Written by Alec Coppel, Bryan Forbes, and Dennis O’Keefe.

What else are we up to this week?

Mary: So we’ve been a bit busy lately, and really just didn’t feel up to writing the newsletter. I’m sorry about that–hopefully we’re getting back into the swing with this edition. Anyway, I could tell you about the movies we’ve watched–Sinners, O Brother Where Art Thou? (a.k.a White Sinners), How Green Was My Valley… but that’s not the most important news. That would be 

That’s right, we’re doing a live show for our 200th episode. On July 19th, we’re headed to Space 1026, where we’ll be showing Surf Nazis Must Die and recording our show. Ticket information will be coming soon, but in the meantime, mark your calendars!

Dennis: Saw a magazine article on a David Hockney exhibition and fell in love. It’s the kind of paintings I’d probably hate when I was younger but find myself drawn to more and more as I get older. Bright colors laying on each other in interesting ways. He later transitioned to computer drawing, sometimes seemingly just using something like MS Paint and scrawling pixelated lines all over the place to show light. It looks childlike at first but then he’ll create perfect images, like rain drops on the water or tree shadows on a road, and I think the limitations of the software helped him focus and distill those images to find what delighted him. 

I also love pixel art, I grew up playing Atari 2600 and Commodore 64 and those pixels have always stuck with me. On the Atari, after games were done a lot of times the game would freeze on your last board and just change colors, seemingly at random with the music or sound effects ending abruptly. One of my favorites was Realsports volleyball. A beach volleyball game where you’d play the computer or opponent to a certain score then it would end. But after it ended, the sea (blue and green lines in the background, there was even a fizzy static sound to accompany it) would continue to move, electric waves endlessly crashing to the shore while the color palette would completely change, sometimes in a bright summer color, sometimes cold and wintery, sometimes red and autumnal. It had a moody quality, like the Endless Summer poster. This was a later Atari game so it had more colors and even the people looked recognizable. 

So I tried a few. I found a pixel art program for the iPad a while ago (Pixaki) but wasn’t inspired. Mary asked if I had anything for the newsletter and I said I’d write something but not draw anything and as soon as I said it I thought of a drawing.

Most are from memory, each drawing is 64×72 pixels. The pizza was from Ambler, I had gotten a coke that said Derek and sheepishly admitted that it wasn’t my name to the girl at the counter like Liam Neeson in Ted. There’s one of Mary drinking a scotch on our back deck, and one of her looking at her phone in the dark. I’ve always had a fascination with people’s faces lit by cell phones. There’s one based on a picture I took of a guy drinking at a sushi place. I think he was annoyed I took his picture, but something about the setting got to me. A Flyers game, a rabbit by the pool, birds, me digging a post hole, the dmv, and that’s supposed to be a 20-sided die. We played dnd a few days ago, it’s been a while for both of us (years for me, decades for Mary). 

I can’t remember the last time I wrote for the newsletter, work has sucked, the world has sucked, I’ve been kind of offline for a while. Hangar18 was pretty dumb, I think it was a good movie to catch part of on cable then turn the channel when it got boring, like the 2nd screen programming ideal that Netflix is chasing after, just good enough for you to check back in to see how it all ends. Very disappointed that there wasn’t much for Darren McGavin to do other than to be shocked at the “secrets of the aliens”. I think they wanted that movie to be something like what The DaVinci Code would be years later, and it was just as dumb. The Black Knight felt like it would’ve benefitted from the MST3K treatment, as Alan Ladd was set new standards for phoning it in as the star of a movie. I can’t believe I didn’t realize that there were 2 Doctor Who’s in the movie, with the second Doctor Patrick Troughton as a cowardly evil Cornish king, and movie Doctor Peter Cushing as Sir Palamides in unfortunate brown face. If you don’t know, there were two Doctor Who movies made in the 1960s, Dr Who and the Daleks, and Daleks’ Invasion Earth 2150 AD. I haven’t seen either, but know Peter Cushing plays Dr. Who (his official name in the movie) as a human who stole a tardis, I think. Anyway, I’m sure Peter did fine as I like him in anything I’ve seen him in. 

Pizza:  

NEXT EPISODE:  We take on the infamous anthology film the Twilight Zone, a movie whose on-set problems–including three tragic and avoidable deaths–have overshadowed everything else.

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